Most of the time, we do not regret the things that we did in the past,th
rather, more often than not, we regret the things we didn’t do. So, we should
take more risks and live life fully each day.
These past few days were so carefree. Sure there were some anxious moments
but I tried not to get those unnecessary head-clutter to bother me,
living a carefree life is fun, it’s nice to hang out with new people
and talk about silly things, act dumbly without worrying what other people woud say.
I always think that I don’t need to explain myself to people I don’t really know
well. Explanations are for people who cares for you and you want them to understand
you better.
—–
I had been drinking liquor at least once a week for the past three weeks.
It’s more than my usaul dosage of alcohol.
I was super drunk once, to the point of having a black out and having to
throw up on the streets. I guess that would be the first and last time of my life
that I would ever get drunk like that. It was memorable in a sense that I can’t remember
half of the things I did that night. Actually, I came from PM shift that day,
then went to Torres with my duty partner. Some of my friends were waiting for us,
then I drank mixes of liquor. I dislike drinking margarita, it really makes
me so drunk even with just three shots. It was a night of total ignorance,
I know I can’t handle my margarita well, but still I took the shots, plus
a bucket of Red Horse Beer. It was obviously more than what I could handle.
Not contended with that, my friend suggested we go to UC, so UC here we come,
then total black out. I could not remember what else followed. All I could
remember was arriving at home. My duty partner tried to tell me the stupid things
I said and did but I stoppped him. It was worth not knowing.
—-
Coackraoaches are actully one of the world’s oldest surviving species and
they play a vital role in the food web, but still, it doesn’t change the fact
that it’s dirty and it’s gross. Plain Ewwww!!!
This being said, however, it can’t be helped,
You have to admire a cockroach’s persistence and determination.
Have you seen a cockroach rolling over its back, how it struggles to
turn itself on its stomach? Admirable.
I guess even cockroaches teach something to humans.
—-
I guess it’s time to decide what to do with my life. Again.
Waiting is scuh a bore, and I’ve realized that I can’t wait for
my life to happen, somehow, I know I have to step up and
make it happen. I already said that my way is clearer than before.
but I used up my options so now I’m creating more choices.
I realized that despite how good my evaluation was, how good was
my interview, no matter how I tried so hard to get what I want,
it’s all useless. In the end, the decision was out of my hands,
obviously, I did my part but people have different impressions,
perhaps, my hardest wasn’t enough. I get it. There are other things
for me to do. Everything happens for a reason and it was my fault for
expecting so much out of this. So, I’m putting an end to this expecting
thing and move forward.
So, okay, forward! One step, one step.
It seems I’m taking a lot of detour. Am I going in circles again,
or was I never out from this tiring cycle at all?
